Slow sex is trending and increasingly popular among couples – there is no pressure to be a good lover.
“With slow sex one can learn some new things: that orgasm is not always necessary and that it is more important to experience more excitement. This kind of sex is like detoxification, “explains sex instructor Jela Kramer.
Slow sex is “invented” by John Humphrey Noyes, an American pioneer in free love in the distant 1884. With the so-called caress method (caress) wanted to prevent sperm and spontaneous pregnancy after several spontaneous abortions, so he practiced lovemaking instead of reproduction.
The term slow sex appeared in 2011 in the book of the same name by tantra expert Diana Richardson.
“Sex is gentle and is based on emotional closeness,” explains Jela Kremer, adding that “this closes the closed circle of expectations, withdrawal and frustration.”
First, it takes a long time – slow sex can last 3 hours or longer. The phone or doorbell should not ring during this time. If one of your partners is stressed out, you should first take a deep breath – breathe deeply into your stomach and listen to the sound of your inhalation and inhalation. And one thing you must understand: orgasm doesn’t matter.
“The first seven times it’s worth banning an orgasm so you have more freedom for other experiences,” Kramer explains.
Then comes the warm-up phase.
“Lie naked in bed together, get close, don’t touch, relax your body and don’t get too excited. At the next stage carnage is allowed. He can put his hand on your intimate zone, and you on his, but gently, without stimulation, “explains Jela Kramer.
“Are you tempted to press a point that you know works with your partner? Better not. Keep an eye on yourself, tell yourself exactly what you are feeling and wanting from one another. In the reunion phase, gently knit without too much movement. It can also be done with a mild erection. This is called soft penetration. “
The best poses for slow sex are spoon and scissors, where the erect penis can still remain in the vagina.
When slow sex is over, do not get up immediately and return to your daily responsibilities. Give thanks to each other and consciously separate.