Red Alarm: When does the flirt turn into something more serious?


The innocent and naive flirt can for a moment turn into something more serious, and the border is so thin that some people unconsciously cross.

Psychologist Suzanne Kraus Witbourne discovers when the flirt turns into something more serious and when you need to pull a “handbrake”.

If you are avoiding telling your partner that you have flirted with another person, you should ask yourself what is your reason for this silence. Or flirting does not mean anything to you or you are afraid of your partner’s reaction because you have crossed the boundary of a naive flirt that is wrong when you are in a serious relationship.

If you flirt for a long time with someone you often see, it’s not a problem as long as it’s ordinary jokes and looks. But if you began to rely on this person for emotional support and you seek support from her, and you are not looking for it from your partner, then it is very likely that you have switched to “emotional cheating.”

Emotional cheating is actually revealing certain things to the person you’re flirting with, and you have not yet discovered it to your partner.

“It’s often about attracting another person, but that does not mean that your relationship is in a crisis. Then you can only ask yourself what you get from the person you flirt with, and you can not get it from your partner and whether it’s really worth risking the relationship, “says Witbourne.

It is very important to be aware of yourself and your behavior if you have previously been known as someone who often flirts and can not pay attention to only one person. In that case you need to be honest and not engage in serious relationships in order not to harm the person who seriously puts time and emotions in you.

If the person with whom you flirt already have internal jokes that no one else understands, it could harm your relationship.

“Imagine you are in the company of your partner and the person you flirt with and share with you inner jokes. It can hurt the feelings of your partner who will feel isolated, and possibly humiliated, “says Witbourne.

The “end stage” is when you start thinking about the person you flirt when you are with your partner. It’s already a sign that you started developing feelings for the person you flirt.

When you cross the border, do not pretend that nothing has happened. Recognize that you are troubled / in love and think about whether you would have a future with that person. Do not forget that it is possible for the person with whom you flirt to be just flirting and nothing more and it is possible that your feelings will not be returned.


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